Disturbed Should Have a Fivver Fig for LOP Favors

I can see it now:

Gig Title: $5 for a 5 Minute Meeting with Disturbed!

Gig Extras:

Add $5 for each additional 5 minutes.

For PM contact add $10 (4 PMs maximum)

For a one week ban to be lifted, add $5.

For a one month ban to be lifted, add $10.

For a 2-12 month ban to be lifted, add $20.

For any other ban to be lifted, please order the gig and we can negotiate.

For banning of a LOP member with less than 100 posts, add $10.

For banning of a LOP member with 101-500 posts, add $25.

For any banning of a LOP member with over 500 posts, please order the gig and we can negotiate.

For a modship, add $200.